Reality.

While laying in bed on Christmas eve I expressed my bittersweet feelings to Mark about Christmas. I felt sad to not be at home but excited to share the morning with Mark & the day with our families. I realized I would wake up on Christmas and celebrate differently & although, my childhood may be coming to an end I am starting new traditions & new memories.

We woke up around 8, came downstairs (at the same time), made coffee & sat together as we alternated opening presents. The presents I received are a representation of my life right now & I loved each and every one. I'm going to be a wife, sharing a home, needing & desiring nice adult items. I got a door mat, sheets, sweaters, rain boots, new perfume, trail running sneaks, slippers & poka dot plates! It was amazing. After breakfast, we went to Mark's mom's house to open gifts with his siblings, Jo & Mike. Later, we went to my parent's and walked into total beautiful chaos. The kids had just received their first presents, everyone was watching & loving their excitement. They wanted to play with each toy before opening another. I felt so blessed to have my family together with so much joy and excitement. We had a delicious dinner with pineapple glaze. Most of all, the holidays are a gorgeous time and I hope to continue to be thankful and feel this much love throughout the next year.

Unfortunately, on this sunny Sunday the reality has set in. I'm about to go to the grocery store & pick up ingredients for a few dinners this week. I plan on making some of the following: smarter fettuccine Alfredo, lasagna, enchilada bake, stir fry & pulled pork.

After much discussion, Mark & I are planning to save much needed money for our wedding, house & hopefully for our kids.. one day. This has already sparked some disappointment, reality, and will power. We are becoming grown ups and sometimes we are going to have to act like them...

Tomorrow, I have a doctor's appointment to review my tests & hopefully determine where my body isn't functioning. The first guess is my kidney. After the SED test, came back with a 42 & I'm supposed to have lower than a 20 & protein in my urine they guessed it isn't working properly. I will have to give a mid-week update.

Otherwise, I plan to go grocery shopping, watch the Eagles & read some bride magazines later.
Merry Christmas & try to enjoy the slow week before 2010.